A Glaswegian is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptising people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher.The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon he asks the drunk,'Are you ready to find Jesus?'The drunk shouts, 'Aye, I am.' So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, 'Brother, have you found Jesus?'The drunk replies, 'No, Ah havnae found Jesus.'The preacher shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again for a little longer. He again pulls him out of the water and asks again, 'Have you found Jesus, my brother?'The drunk again answers, 'No, Ah havnae found Jesus.'By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in the water again --- but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds and when he begins kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up.The preacher again asks the drunk, 'For the love of God have you found Jesus?'The drunk wipes his eyes, catches his breath and says to the preacher,
'Are you sure this is where he fell in?'
I'm always the one nearest the door. I can slip in and out with no one noticing me. Of course, nothing gets past me either.....
Sunday, December 15, 2013
A joke from IanO
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Hell to Pay - Jenny Thomson
An unputdownable read!
I had been out of the habit of reading books but decided to read Hell to Pay while on holiday after not having read a book for over a year. I started it mid morning and the next thing I knew was that it was starting to get dark outside and I had read the whole book in one sitting and was thirsty and hungry!
Do not read this book on a train as you will miss your stop!
I won't ruin the story for you by saying too much. It grabs you straight from the start when you wonder where Nancy is and what has happened to her. Finding out she is in a clinic having been seriously ill and deeply shocked by the murder of her parents and an attack on herself which should have left her dead, she decides to make herself strong and once released from the clinic, she sets out to investigate the crime herself having no faith in the well meaning inspector who tries to help her. Uncovered facts closer to home she is struggling to recall may hold the key...
This is a gripping read and I loved the author's grim Scottish humour which made me laugh aloud at times. Read this! You won't be disappointed. Hurry up and write another one please Jenny!
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